To Lead is to Invite

In social dancing, when I'm following, I always try to achieve whatever move the lead is telling me to do with their cues. If I have a "hiccup," I find myself asking the lead, "What did you mean by that?" Or "What did you mean for me to do there?" I assume that if I don't achieve what was desired, it is my fault. A few months ago, I was dancing at a local salsa venue. After the third apology of the night, my lead said to me, "Don't apologize. A cue is simply an invitation. You don't have to accept it." My mind was blown. I had the perception that a cue was a direction that had to be followed. What would it mean if cues were simply invitations? For one thing, less apologizing. Perhaps I would


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